Bealtaine Celebrations at the Kilkenny School of Druidry
Bealtaine Celebrations at the Kilkenny School of Druidry

I continue to be amazed at the great winds of energy that blow through me during the great Celtic/pre-Christian festivals of the year. Bealtaine for me, which I have written about in a recent blog was no exception. On the first of May, I renewed my commitment to music, to which the universe responded to by sending to me an angel that same day, in the form of a Sebastian, fellow soul seeker on his journey walking thru Ireland, a pilgrimage to the deeper roots of his being. We celebrated the festival with druids to which it transpired he had a strong connection. It was a baptism of love for Sebastian, as it was his first time to be part of a druid gathering. For 2 weeks he stayed with me. We shared music, inspiration and challenge. His sincere love of the truth echoed in my heart. When we parted company it was like observing all his wonderful attributes, aware of them deeply and simply watching them float away, yet knowing they’re always deep inside. It was for me an affirmation of the path I follow and a call to stay on this path, the path of my own truth.

I continue to write music. Sebastian inspired a version of Shenandoah, the great song of the river.  At the Bealtaine druid gathering I sang my rendition of Psalm 23, The Lords my Shepherd. The host, Howard, suggested I sing more psalms and so my version of Psalm 145 has manifested. I hope to record it soon.

I have become part of a wonderful expressive arts group, founded on the idea of expression and performance can be low skill, high sensitivity and working with all mediums including word, sound, movement, form and colour. Our current project ‘The Life of Rumi’ tells his story in music, dance and story telling. We made our debut performance in the RDS Dublin in April and are planning other performances.

And lastly to top all that I have come across a wonderful teacher, guide, healer, named Miranda Macpherson. I was so inspired by her website that I wrote her this letter

Dear Miranda

I watched your latest interview on  the Youtube channel Conscious TV, and wish to acknowledge the inspiration and support your words and presence have given me in further integrating my ego into this vast endless unknowing we call life. I am prompted to thank your femininity for this integration. My own ‘spiritual practice’ has been very masculine. When the ego arises to throw a spanner in the works my response, let’s say it was anger, was to say,

‘this is anger, its fine.. it’s not mine’

The declaration ‘it’s not mine’ is so loaded. In my experience of these words, they have the capacity to instantly isolate all of known existence from spirit. One is placed in a black and white world of ‘well do you want to wallow in your own self-pity in this vale of tears or do you want to set your attention on higher realms’. This practice may tick all the boxes for others, but for me there has always been something missing. You, as I perceive you, speak of

‘the relaxation of the ego rather that the annihilation of the ego’

The ego as frightened and lost as it maybe, is still a part of the whole. So these days thanks to you and other wonderful inspirations, when my old friend anger arises, the nothingness of the masculine’s very direct cutting to the core is alerted but now, acts in unison with that fluidity and flow that, it appears, only the river of the feminine can bestow.

There is Black and white, Day and night, Body and soul, Heaven and earth

There’s so many levels of reality and perception, so many extremes, so many ways we can isolate ourselves into very confining boxes of thought, of belief, of habit, of comfort. With my songs and sounds, I find a way of dancing with, around and between all the extremes into the middle ground, into the present moment.  I feel your energy, your flow and it supports the energy and flow of my ever-changing dance. I would love to sing my songs for you in person sometime. For now I sing with you the song that goes as follows:

What’s it like to completely live in the moment?  See what arises, Be with what arises

What’s holding you back from expanding your full potential?  See what arises, Be with what arises

(having asked yourself these 2 questions…….ask yourself) What’s holding you now?  See what arises, Be with what arises

It would be good to gather with others and support one another in asking these questions in a spirit of love, openness, curiosity, humility, trust, patience, willingness and a sincere search for the truth. I’m interested in starting such a group in Ireland or elsewhere.

‘We come home together or we do not come home at all’

With Gratitude and Love




Published by fionntáin

In 2005 i had a profound spiritual experience leading me to record my debut album, ‘Under the Great Shady Tree’. I have faced depression, sadness, anger, jealousy, guilt, sexual craving, loss, grief, disapproval, fear, loneliness and many other emotions and have found the strength within to keep going. In 2015 i had another profound spiritual experience which opened my heart wider still, and allows me today to see that everything we experience is here to help us. Today i have left most of the modalities i have practiced in the past and live with the ever increasing knowing that I am the creator of my reality. I am the only one.

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